Making a Long Distance Relationship Work
While living far apart adds a new dimension to a relationship, it doesn’t mean that it’s the end of the world. You can make it work if you try. So, if you find yourself in that situation, here are some things you can do to keep your relationship intact despite the miles between you and him:
Make as Much Time for Each Other as Possible
When you’re living worlds apart, you have to take advantage of whatever time you can have together. It used to be that the only communication option you had was a telephone, and the only time you could talk is when you were both home.
However, with modern technology, your options are now far better. You can text throughout the day to send “I love you” and “I’m thinking of you” messages back and forth. You can send funny pictures or the video to ‘your song’ to him in a private Facebook message. You have the option of video chatting so you don’t have to wait long periods to see his cute smile or how he has one dimple that is extra pronounced when he turns his head a certain way.
With as much access as you have to communication devices, it’s easy to let him know that you’re thinking of him. Of course, you don’t want to overdo it and flood him using every resource available, but a well-timed text or message every now and again is enough to let him know he’s on your mind and in your heart.
Don’t Multitask When You’re Talking to Him
When you’re talking or video chatting with him, don’t try to do ten other things at the same time. Let him know that he’s important and has your attention.
It’s really the same when you’re physically together with someone. Who likes to be sitting at dinner with someone who spends the whole time on their phone texting or checking their emails? Makes you feel invaluable, right? Show him he’s worth the time to stop what you’re doing and be fully engaged in your conversation.
Say What You Need to Say
When you have limited time together, it’s easy to push feelings and concerns under the rug because you don’t want to spoil your time talking about something that may start a fight or hurt feelings. But, if you hold things in and don’t share them, you’re opening a door to resentment and problems that may get too big to fix.
If you have something on your mind, say it. Let him know if you’re struggling or have concerns. Communication is even more important when you’re miles apart because that is all you have. The sooner you learn how to talk, the stronger your relationship will become.
Enjoy the Time You Do Have Together
At some point in time, you’ll be together, even if it’s only for a few days, and enjoying some well-needed time with each other. If it doesn’t happen very often, make sure you enjoy it.
The best thing you can do is stay in the present moment and enjoy whatever you’re doing together. Don’t let your mind wander to the past or the future. If you do, then you’re missing out on what is happening right in front of you.
Balance Serious Talks With Fun Ones
A huge mistake that couples can make is spending their entire talk time discussing work challenges or home obligations. That stuff does need to be discussed, but not all the time. You still have to have laughs and good times too. If every talk is the same thing time and time again, you’ll both lose interest and that isn’t good.
When two people are together and they live close to each other, they go through this when they date. They go out and have fun conversations and laugh and joke with each other. Since you don’t have that option, you have to be able to create that environment even when you can’t be physically in the same room.
Take the time to share something funny or do something that makes him laugh. Let him see that you still have a fun side and you want to share it with him.
Have Clear Expectations
This is probably the most important part of making a long distance relationship work. You both have to be on the same page and understand exactly where you’re at and where you’re going.
It’s not going to be good if one of you thinks that the situation is going to last for a month or two and the other expects it to last a year or two. The quickest way to a break-up is when you’re both on different pages.
You need to know and understand how long your situation is going to continue and at what point you’ll look at changing things and possibly transitioning to a life where you’re together full-time. You’ll have logistics to work out, such as who moves where and what impact it has on you financially.
This is a lot to think about, but if you want to be together, you’ll make it work. That’s the nice thing about love. It makes all things bearable and doable.
(youqueen.com)
